While this year’s Dewmocracy contained a neon orange and a white beverage, here I am stuck with a plain ass green Mtn Dew. It’s called Distortion, and it tastes nothing like an electric guitar’s pedal box. Honestly, I don’t even know why it’s going up against the other two drinks. It’s like Nickelback headlining one of the days at Coachella.
It’s not even that this drink is bad like Nickelback, because it’s not. It’s just so damn boring and plain. It’s like having the option to take a week-long vacation anywhere in the world and you settle on the Library of Congress in DC. I don’t know who they’re trying to trick into voting for this, but Mountain Dew is supposed to be extreme and stuff right? This is like Ronald Reagan trying to heli-snowboard. It’s just regular tasting Mtn. Dew with a bit of lime flavor mixed in. It’s a bit bolder and more flavorful, but it’s really nothing special and it actually reminds me a lot of regular ol’ Sprite. “Blasted with lime?” Who are they kidding? It’s not like they had a giant cannon that shoots citrus fruit. As far as I know, I still hold the patent on that kind of device.
I’d even go as far as saying this is actually a pretty good soda, but it just doesn’t belong in this competition. The other drinks actually resemble new products that were crafted from scratch, while this is just an old standard with a flavor shot and fancy packaging. It’s almost a shame really, if this was just marketed as Mountain Dew with Lime it would probably appeal to a larger market and probably exist longer. Now it just seems like it will fade out entirely, with those sodas from last year I can’t remember. I just can’t see this drink winning, but then again, I can’t believe it made it past being a concept and into production for the contest to begin with.
Mountain Dew is up to their Dewmocracy scheme again where they have people choose their favorite out of three new Dews to become a permanent member of the Dew family. The flavor I got was Typhoon, a Fruit Punch sorta drink that is actually a Strawberry-Pineapple flavor of sorts. Mixing Fruit Punch and Mountain Dew pretty much tastes like you would imagine – punch-y with a harsh kick to the throat. The flavor is full and strong though, and the drink is refreshingly tropical. Besides it being a perfect mix for some of your favorite vodka, there really isn’t anything I found too exciting or ambitious about this “new” flavor, which is kind of the point of the competition.
Another thing, is it just me or are all three flavors in this year’s Dewmocracy competition basically citrus flavors? You got Distortion, which is a Lime drink – citrus. White Out, a “smooth citrus” flavor, couldn’t be any more citrus. And there’s Typhoon, under the guise of “Fruit Punch” and “Tropical”, which is actually Strawberry-Pineapple, which is half citrus. You don’t get to tropical without infringing on citrus at some point. So nice job, Mountain Dew/Voters. You essentially created that election in the Futurama episode “A Head in the Polls” where it’s Jack Johnson vs. John Jackson. “I think your citrus flavor goes too far!” “I think YOUR citrus flavor doesn’t go too far enough!”
You guys all remember Mountain Dew Voltage, right? That flavor that is everywhere now because won Dewmocracy last year because I said it would? Well, they’re doing it again with three new flavors. Kaitis has taken Distortion (Lime), Mason got Typhoon (Fruit Punch (Strawberry-Pineapple)), and I’m left with “White Out”. Yes, readers, I have resorted to drinking white out for you. The only thing is it doesn’t look anything like white out. It looks rather unsettlingly like… man… juice.
Mountain Dew White Out is a murkily translucent, off-white “smooth citrus” flavor. I have no idea why they chose to represent “smooth citrus” with an exceedingly jizz color drink, but they did. Seriously, it gives me a tummy ache AND makes me question my sexuality just looking at it and thinking about drinking it. If you take off the curiously red, white, and blue label they tacked onto it, the bottle would look right at home on the set of an adult movie shoot. Every time I look at it, I just can’t believe they picked that color for a drink. You almost just expect to move the bottle around and find that it’s actually really thick and goopy.
The taste? You think I put this stuff in my mouth? It took me a while, a few times of putting the bottle to my lips and losing my nerve, but I finally managed to taste it and I CAN’T believe how average it is. In fact, if you took Sprite, 7-up, Sierra Mist, and a hint of store-brand orange soda and mixed it all up and made it colored like man seed, you would have Mountain Dew Money Shot, I mean White Out. I didn’t drink more than a few sips of this stuff, and didn’t want to. Dewmocracy is supposed to exist to bring unique and tasty flavors to the soda world, and this is so far from either of those. Do not vote for White Out, lest you want people thinking you’re guzzling globs of baby-maker, Dew-style. Just one more note: be careful when drinking this beverage, as it has a tendency to splurt into your eyes.
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i tasted all three i like typhone the best
i like tyophoon the best of the three, also since mtn dew isnt creative anymore why dont they just bring back out pitch black 2 at least that was good
see i dont like any cuz im not a gay fag that that sits at home trying out flavors of soda cuz i have more important things to do.
And yet you took some time out of your "more important things" to comment on an article written by people who sat at home trying out flavors of soda.
I am a gay fag that has time to sample new drinks, and I can't decide between the white and the red one. The green just tasted like the regular stuff with some lime chemical mixed in. Oh well, I can't vote online, and either one is going to win. So I don't care.Stacey "got nothing better to do" E.
typhoon was the best
All three of these flavors are terrible. The white out is Sweet Grapefruit, (like overly sweetend Fresca). I Liked 2 of three last year, and even the third was not bad. These however, all are bad. I will stick with Code Red and Regular (and my horded stock of Throwback) Hope next year is better.
my favorite mountian dew was the typhoon it tasted great but i just did not like the taste of the disortion it tasted weird. i wonder what the next new flavors will be, they will probably taste awesome.i can't wait.
Typhoon …. not to be confused with poon. Get's my vote. Now if only they made a poon flavorded drink. I'd buy some PepsiCo stock. Mr. Nasty
Typhoon…FTW
i like distortion the best because typhoon is just fruity and white out has a flavor like sprite
white outs the worst and typhoon and distortion are decent
Typhoon for the win. Now everyone that is on this forum telling how great it is GO VOTE THREE TIMES A DAY! Typhoon is losing to white out by 4 percent. It's not over yet but if we don't hurry there will be TWO crappy dewmocracy flavors on the shelves. Also last year the purple one was exactly the same as pitch black. Pitch Black was just a really dark purple.
BRING BACK PITCH BLACK
distortion is the best of the 3 easly. white out just tastes like sprite, typhoon is pretty good, but distortion just taste the best
White all the way because, think of it, there really is no WHITE soda!! Plus then there's a little bit of a change, more smooth than shocking.
WHITE OUT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
They're all bad. Remember, if you vote for the least worst (much like our last presidential election) you're stuck with that flavor. At least I won't have to purchase any when I go to the store.
white out's the best in my opinion.typhoon tastes too much like monster, and distortion is…ugh.
Typhoon is the best…keep that around and you'll have a customer for life.
Out of all the mountain Dew Voltage is My top Fav but White out is my second fav so i think that WHITE OUT SHOULD WIN !!!!!!!
I liked TYPHOON AND DISTORTION becasue there better than white out. white out doesnt really have a taste. TYPHOON AND DISTORTION SHOULD WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:))))))))))))
Pitch Black II wasn't good, sour bleh. Pitch Black I was the best flavor imo. Of the new ones I can't decide between Whiteout and Typhoon. Distortion tastes too much like Surge (coke's attempt at a dew)
typhoon needs to win and by the way everybody knows typhoon is gona win they split it by 4 persent so more people will vote and they will sell more sodas in the end "may the best soda win"
pooopy
me my brother and all his friends which is like 17 friends all say white out because the other ones just taste all sour so i'm in for white out and so is my bro with 17 more people
i like all 3 flavors, but if i had to decide between them id say Distortion. Only because of the fact that Whiteout is just like sprit, 7up and Sierra Mist with a tad of citrus.Typhoon is to tropical for my tastes. Last year was better in my opinion, and yes i agree please bring back pitch black
it has to be whiteout….
TYPHOON AND WHITEOUT WERE DEF MY FAV'S!!! DISTORTION WAS JUST GROSS!!! LOL
gotta be Distortion, it's mildly addictive
well, typhoon is the best.whiteout looks like jizz…distorion looks like piss…there you go for all of those potty people in the place!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TYPHOON AND DISTORTION SUXXXX WHITE OUT IS THE SHIZZ NITZZZZZZZZ
i really love the white out. cause i like to sit around and drink soda. i have lots of time to try new soda. And its really really good!!!!
TYPHOON PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!! OMG I really hope it wins. I also really miss the flavors from last year. All of them were good. I actually wish that you guys would just bring back Nova and Revolution just for like a limited time… I miss them. But yeah. TYPHOOOOOOON!!!! :]
I tasted all 3 of three and typhoon was def the best!
I love the White Out, although I have to admit that I did not try the green one.
all of u sons of bitches can bow down to typhoon its clearly the best the other 2 are not all that good first of all distortion it tastes like those lime tortilla chips that you get from the store and i dont want to waste my money on a soda that tastes like lime tortilla chips … if i wanted some lime tortilla chips i would get some , second of all white its better than distortion yes but its pretty much a attempt at frescha or squirt its just not meant to be its way too sweet and you start to lose taste after a while its not really a soda you can sit down and enjoy or drink whiile you play videos game or for some people world of warcraft. so last but not least typhoon clearly the best choice because its unique in its own retrospect with a fruit punch kick the the mountain dew we all have come to know and love its just better than the rest … its about damn time they made a fruit punch dew ive been waiting for 18 years and it lost well you people get what you want while the minorities get shit shoveled in their face thanks a lot typhoon should have won when the next dewmocracy comes around make sure you vote for the right one
I like th distortion the best
why didnt typhoon fucking win!!