Good on ya, Hoyt, for finally taking the chick bait and getting some action. It’s refreshing to see more good natured vampire interactions after the majorly twisted scenario involving Lafayette, Eric, and the dismembered body parts of a former redneck. Jessica isn’t the most interesting character to behold, but the makeup of her story and surroundings could lead to further intrigue. It was definitely bizarre to see Hoyt being mounted in Bill’s house, on Bill’s couch, as Bill and Sookie walk in the door – excellent moment.

Moments of such excellence were sparse during this episode; the starter and follow-up episodes of season 2 had a furious pace, cramming groundbreaking, plot development dialogue in between intense character encounters. Scratches focuses mostly on Sookie’s meeting with a minotaur, and her resulting scrapes, or aptly named scratches. They looked wholly real and absolutely disgusting, so watching an old hag dig her crusty finger around inside was far from pleasurable, but of course it was necessary. Regardless of my feelings towards the grotesqueness of the scene, I have to tip my hat to the makeup department, assuming they’re responsible for concocting and plastering that mess onto Anna Paquin’s back. Oppositely, I’d like to offer some hate to whoever decided to wrap up this portion of Lafayette’s story with him crying in a blanket.

Far from being in danger of minotaurs, let alone queermo flag-football players, Jason’s god complex is walking him down some increasingly boring roads. I’m holding my breath in hopes that the end of his Jesus journey will justify the torturous cry-baby scenes about Jason’s helplessness to save his grandmother; his ego is certainly as enormous as ever, seemingly unlike Eggs, who Tara quickly lost interest in upon his acceptance of a massage at the hands of a bare-breasted beauty. Eggs intrigues me not because he has secrets, but because I feel like the answers to his secrets will give us insight into the mysterious Maryanne’s motives. What does she want with Sam, if it’s really him she’s after? And in regards to people wanting Sam, the shocker ending involving Daphne on the dock has me wishing it was six days from now. That was almost as awesome as Hoyt attempting to school Jessica on Wii Sports, or Maryanne rolling Tara a breakfast joint. Gotta love Alan Ball.